I Think I Want Him Back – How Can I Be Sure?

If you’ve just been through a bad breakup, the world looks like a pretty grim place. Nothing seems to matter except the pain. It’s simple human nature to believe that the only way to stop that pain is to get things back to the way they were. It’s obvious, isn’t it? You were happy when you were together with him and now that you’re apart, you’re miserable.

But is that really always the case? After all, what you did have came to a bad end; so you need to ask yourself if it was ever really right for you, and if it was, did it reach a point where it finally became very wrong. You yearn for a second chance. You still feel as if you’re in love. You’re convinced there’s a future together. But be honest with yourself – towards the end, at least, wasn’t there something missing? Wasn’t the end inevitable? If the answer to these questions is ‘yes’ then you need to take a good look at your feelings because what you’re missing may not be him but rather the idea of being with someone.

When you’ve been used to companionship as close as this, it’s very hard to adjust to being alone so you just want to turn back time. But it might not be the answer. You can’t rely on a patched up relationship to give you confidence and self-esteem. You have to rebuild those things for yourself by taking control of your life and rediscovering the pleasure of independence. That will make your chances of finding the right person much higher.

So you should only try to get him back if you can honestly say to yourself that’s not only what you want but also what you need.