How Not to Let Your Ex Take Advantage of You

You probably never thought the television could accurately portray your life; however, as you sit and watch the chaotic mess of static you suddenly realize TV was right all along. After your breakup, you feel just like the fighting ants featured on the screen. Unfortunately if you’re in this state of mind it’s easy to be taken advantage of by your ex.

Naturally you’re going to want to remain close to your ex because you think this will give you a fighting chance to get your ex back. Sadly, this is most often not the case. Continuing to see your ex after a breakup is just bad all around because in your vulnerable state you’re likely to do anything to get your ex back. Your ex might see this and just take you up on the anything.

If he gave you up, he gave all of you up. Staying in his life won’t help convince him to take you back. Have you ever heard of the phrase “friends with benefits”? Essentially, that’s what you’ve become if you stay in his life after he breaks it off. By staying in his life, you’re not giving yourself what you deserve: which is a commitment from him. He gets all the pleasures of being around you but only on his terms. He’s going to take his free time that was committed to you and put it in other places—perhaps even with other women.

More to the benefits your ex is likely to get from you if you stay in his life after a breakup is a free sexual relationship. Because there is nothing to hold him to you during the day, he’s going to run off and only come to you when he needs a little pick-me-up. By giving up you as his girlfriend, he has given up every aspect that a loving relationship has, including this. By giving yourself up for nothing, you’re only making it harder on yourself. The pain of being told you guys are still just friends after a night of that is more than enough to crush you all over again. Don’t hope that sleeping with him will save your relationship.

People have to live with the choices they make: that includes your ex. If he wants to break things off, he loses everything. You are the only one capable of making him learn the consequences of breaking up with you. Give him some time to realize his mistake in leaving and while he’s learning, you can make a plan to get your ex back.